I was recently thinking about how campaign season has a way of testing everything—your patience, your endurance, and sometimes even your friendships. It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of politics, where every issue feels personal and every opinion is louder than the last. But what happens when you and a close friend find yourselves on opposite sides of the ballot? Does it mean the end of a friendship?
I’ve been struggling with that question lately because, to be honest, a few of my close friends have revealed themselves to be supporters of candidates who are known racists. And worse, some have even thrown their weight behind Donald Trump. It’s been a tough pill to swallow. I never expected to find myself on opposite sides of the political spectrum from people I care about. I thought our values were aligned. So, what now?
For a while, I wondered if those friendships were over. How could I maintain a bond with someone who backs a person whose platform actively harms people like me and those I advocate for? But then I had to take a step back and ask myself some hard questions: Is it possible to hold on to the people you love, even when their political choices seem to go against your very identity? Is there room for disagreement on issues that hit so close to home.
The truth is, I’m still working through that. I’ve had to set boundaries with some friends because the weight of their political choices is too much to carry into every conversation. Plus, I am at that age where I will cut a fill-in-the-blank off in the blink of an eye. But I’ve also realized that cutting people off won’t change the fact that we live in a country where these divides exist. It won’t make the issues go away, and it won’t create a path toward understanding.
Instead, I’m trying (and it’s getting harder and harder) to focus on open dialogue, though it’s far from easy. I’ve learned to prioritize my mental health and protect my energy while still trying to have honest conversations.
Sometimes that means taking a break from political discussions altogether with certain people, especially when it starts to feel like we’re not hearing each other. Friendship, like anything worth having, takes work. It requires mutual respect, even in the face of stark disagreements.
Here’s the thing: disagreements are inevitable, but respect is non-negotiable. Maybe my friends support a candidate I can’t stand or believe in policies I think are harmful causing me to give them the side eye. That doesn’t make them any less of a friend—it just makes them human, with their own experiences and viewpoints. Maintaining a friendship during campaign season is about knowing when to have those heated debates and when to set them aside for something more important—like the shared memories, laughs, and loyalty that brought us together in the first place.
My friendships aren’t just built on politics—they’re built on shared experiences, history, and trust. It’s tough to reconcile all of that with the reality of today’s political climate, but I’m learning that holding on to a friendship doesn’t mean compromising my values. It means knowing when to stand firm and when to let the conversation rest so that we don’t lose each other completely after Election Day.
Friendship doesn’t have to end on Election Day. The key is understanding that what’s on the ballot is temporary, but the people I care about are not. So, this election season, I’m choosing to keep the conversation civil, to listen without needing to agree, and to remind myself that the friendship I’ve built with someone matters more than any political argument. Because when the yard signs come down and the votes are counted, I’d rather still have my friends standing next to me.
Jasmyne A. Cannick is an award-winning journalist, Democratic political strategist, and advocate. Find her at iamjasmyne.com
