Dr. Jeanette Parker 

We hear about anger management and the cures for getting people to try and keep their anger in check and under control. What and when is anger is “mismanaged?”

Mismanaged anger is when some people just appear angry any time and all the time. You may say something to a person and they just want to “bite your head off,” so to speak. You can look at some people and they just look angry. I was at the grocery store the other day; walking up to the check out counter, noticed beforehand the young lady looked noticeably unhappy. She was bagging the groceries and asked me, “Do you have your bag?” (You know grocery stores are charging 10 cents a paper bag now.) I said, “Ooh, I forgot my bag!”

Her reply, “Well sometimes, I forget to come to work.!” Imagine that! I said, “Oh, that can be a big problem!” That’s anger mismanagement. There are protocols for work, home, outside and in the company of other people and everywhere you go. Learn to identify mismanaged anger? Is the person blaming others for their deep inner anger anxiety? Self inner anger is damaging. Laughing on the outside, crying on the inside? Are you looking inside yourself (introspection) to determine how you are mismanaging your anger? Are you misplacing it and blaming your anger on others for something that happened years ago as a child? Do you get angry at someone and keep on being angry about something that someone did years ago (holding grudges) and you thought it was something in your own mind something you “should” be angry about and that it’s all right to keep on staying angry? That’s “anger mismanagement.”

Are you cussing at people in your own home? Slamming doors? Walking around with “angry face” at home, saying from your facial expression, “Keep your distance. Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to be talked to. I want to be angry now.” The person hardly says a word, but the facial expression seems to radiate “Don’t bother me. This is my angry time.” Another point: repulsive facial expressions. All these things come from within the mind and what that person is thinking is expressed outwardly. It’s possible the person is unaware of the effect of their frowning face on others. If you have an “anger mismanagement” problem, start doing introspection to figure, “Am I angry? What am I angry about?” If you can’t figure it out alone, ask someone. Have an ear to hear. Chances you may have been told, “You look angry.” Are you angry?” What are you causing yourself to be angry about? Anger is a detrimental spirit. There is much anger and hatred in the world today…missiles being shot off…people fighting every which way? Tune in for part 2.

Jeanette Grattan Parker, Ph.D., Founder/superintendent Today’s Fresh Start, Inc. 4514 Crenshaw BL., LA 90043 323-293-9826. Inquiring Minds Want To Know ©All rights reserved. www. Askdrjeanetteparker.com Thanks for reading.