He is! She is! What does that mean? I have heard this ,”Oh, he’s a pathological liar.” “What is a pathological liar? Anton Delbrueck called it pseudologia fantastica [and mythomania] a behavior of habitual or compulsive lying?” “What is a compulsive liar?”
Delbrueck described this in 1891 “individuals may be aware they are lying, or may believe they are telling the truth.” Not good. Who wants to be called a liar? Probably nobody. Because the liars lies are the liars truth and indistinguishable, lying goes on all the time.
There’s a lot of lying going on.
Many people were taught from childhood not to lie; but strayed away from principles. Liars skip, twist and pervert the truth habitually and think nothing of it; not a second thought. I’m not a personality disorder expert; but, after living so long and seen so much, I’m convinced that some people have lied so much they have lost sight of what’s the truth. They have blurred, slurred thoughts, spun so many lies, perverted the truth and their behavior is maladaptive, uncontrollable.
They cloak the truth in a lie. Lying is deception. ‘Oh! You tricked me!” Liars are manipulators. Why do people lie in the first place? I suspect they do not think well of themselves, have small egos deep down inside and want to always be bigger and impressive in the sight of others. People who lie hurt themselves. It’s second nature. They need to go to “lying rehab.”
Pervasive liars need treatment; psychosocial therapy. They live in a world centered in their narcissistic lusts. Lying has diminishing effects on the liar and the person being lied to. Respect dwindles. They’re small in their own eyes and therefore think they’re small in everyone’s else eyes too. Some may not perceive lying as a sickness, but when you observe lying over many, many years, paying close attention, you may find that the person is a proverbial liar.
The technique doesn’t change. Coming in with a dramatic explanation. They won’t give you a straight answer and attempt to brainwash you, their children and grandchildren to be liars too! It’s double talk [but not the two edged sword type] They want everyone to believe their lying truth. If you don’t believe it and confront them about it, BAM! there’s a confrontation. Liars wouldn’t know the truth if it came and slapped them in the face. It goes to moral principles.
When you meet someone and observe their habits, you will get just what you experience at that meeting, at least for a while. Or he/she could be an actor, pretender. Any ridiculous excuse will do for the unsuspecting hearer: traffic, the bridge blew up, a sinkhole in the road and I had to climb out of it….on and on. Teach the children.
Jeanette Grattan Parker, Ph.D. is Superintendent/Founder of Today’s Fresh Start Charter School, 4514 Crenshaw BL, LA 90043 323-293-9826; ©Will You Marry Me::Inquiring Minds Want to Know © [email protected]
