SURPRISE! You’re the best single dad! Some single dads rejoice. Others reject responsibility, justify neglect; leave their first family without resources and take on a new family. Sometimes telling the children “I’ve got a new family now.” How devastating! This article is dedicated to those great single dads who accept their responsibility now… having thought about the effect on their children of their absence away… accept responsibility. Even if planned, there is no fixed formula on how to be the good single dad … no instruction booklet. Not only that but becoming a single dad can leave you with no coping skills. The AFRO Black Media Authority [Census Bureau] says a higher percentage of African American children live with single mothers. Break the cycle! You’ve just lost the partner who was supposed to be your biggest support and suddenly you’ve got to hold everything together yourself. The decisions you make at this point will forever affect your children. That’s an important point, because sometimes the effect and consequences of your actions are drastically underestimated. Your actions count “Daddy.” You’re the first teacher! Be strong, reliable, solid, stable-minded. Your kids have got to deal with their own trauma. Don’t talk bad to your children about their mother. It is mistakenly thought the children or young adults can handle separation with no emotions. Not true. If grownups are traumatized, what makes you think the youngsters are not? Thanks to responsible single dads who spend quality time with their children. You don’t have to buy stuff all the time. They need your love. Listen to your children. You’re dad, not another buddy. You teach morals. Listen. Watch. Not everything you see demonstrates what’s in their heart. Single dads respect the moms. I know … sometimes the moms push the dads away. Get help for the benefit of the children and yourself. So, she didn’t turn out to be the bride you thought and perhaps you weren’t what she expected either. Now, keep moving forward. Focus on your mental health and the children. “Keep your mouth shut when you’re tempted to say something snide. Good Dads think about their children’s future, college funds. Congratulations single dads on “preserving life.” “More than crime; accidents; cancer; heart disease and aids, abortion tops the list for African American deaths; more than 19 million Black babies since Roe v. Wade 1973 U.S. Supreme Court decision legalized abortion.” If we keep on like this??? References: John Henry Murphy Sr. a former slave gained freedom following passage of the Emancipation Proclamation of 1863. He started The Afro-American newspaper. It has been in existence for 125 years since August 13, 1892 crusading for racial equality and economic advancement for Black Americans. [References]:LifeStyle FamilyTheTelegraph; Right to Life of Michigan; AFRO Black Media Authority] “Teach the children at home.” Jeanette Grattan Parker, Ph.D., Superintendent Today’s Fresh Start Charter School; author, speaker, All rights reserved copyright: Will You Marry Me; Inquiring Minds Want to Know. [email protected]
