I remember as a child growing up in church, we were taught the importance of loving others and loving your neighbor as yourself. 1 Corinthians 16:14 tells us to do everything in love, but how do we practice loving people who seem unlovable?
What I know is that when we are in these situations, our faith is tested. When we think someone is unlovable, it usually means they do not have qualities that inspire love or admiration. More importantly, I believe that when someone seems unlovable to us, they get on our last nerve and under our skin.
We may even grow to dislike them. Furthermore, how do we forgive those we feel are unlovable—especially when they continue to hurt us and others?
Many of us who believe in turning the other cheek and giving people the benefit of the doubt are experiencing difficult emotions in this current season. We feel betrayed, as if the world is going to hell in a handbasket. We may even feel like there is a target on our backs and that we are under attack.
There is a saying: The first time a dog bites you, it is the dog’s fault. The second time, it is your fault. Where do we draw the line? When do we reach the point where we have done all we can to love those we consider unlovable? How do we keep giving them opportunities without the fear of being bitten yet again?
The current political climate is tragic, filled with racism, hatred, and deceit. Now more than ever, we need to develop thick skin without losing a soft heart. We are even seeing commercials on national television about hate and how we should not hate one another. Why is there such a mean-spiritedness everywhere we turn?
What I find interesting is that most of the time, we do not even have to look past our inner circles to see such behavior. Sometimes, we must seek ways to make a difference right where we are planted, even if it is neither comfortable nor convenient. We must be willing to practice what we know is right. Standing strong on your principles with those closest to you can often be more difficult than shouting from a soapbox.
In the Bible, we learn the story of the Good Samaritan. The Samaritan was the one who stopped and helped a man left on the side of the road to die. This was significant because, in biblical times, Samaritans were of mixed race and considered untrustworthy—at the bottom of society.
However, today, when we use the term “Good Samaritan,” we refer to someone who offers help and assistance without expecting compensation or reward, even when it is not easy or convenient. When was the last time we practiced being a Good Samaritan, especially to someone we consider unlovable?
When I stop and think about how bad the world seems today, I pause and reflect on what our ancestors endured. I recall the words of my paternal grandmother, who shared some of the hardships she faced in the South as a Black woman. Her stories cause me to sit up straight, raise my head, and remember: We have been here before, and we made it through.
We can get through this, too, as long as we keep our eyes on God, strive to live a life pleasing to Him, and do right by others—no matter how they act or behave. In the end, it is not about what someone else does but rather how we respond. Keep teaching the truth, and one day, the truth shall set us free.
Healing Without Hate: It’s a choice. It’s a lifestyle. Pass it on.
Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org to learn more. Wendy is a life strategist, coach, consultant, author, and speaker.
