I come from the generation that watched Dr. Cliff Huxtable, aka William “Bill” Henry Cosby, on television and thought he was the perfect father and family man.  The problem is that was just an image.  The real person, Bill Cosby, has been exposed in the news by nineteen women who have accused him of sexually assaulting them. Not only did he sexually abuse them, but confessions revealed he often drugged or got them drunk first.   The man that played a cop, a doctor, and the ultimate adult in Jell-o commercials, is now looked at as a rapist among other things.

I have been an advocate for many years helping women go from victim to victorious around the subject of sexual abuse.  As a child I experienced this type of abuse from my father and I understand the damage it can have on a woman’s self-esteem and confidence.  Some victims even experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and it can take a lifetime to recover.  Although the crimes that Mr. Cosby is being accused of have past the Statute of Limitations, if he is truly guilty his victims still must live with the shame and pain of the past.  For most of them the only hope they have is to learn how to forgive and heal so they can truly move on with their lives.

Although Mr. Cosby has not come out and claimed complete innocence, a former Cosby Show employee Frank Scotti, said he was in charge of delivering payoffs to eight different women.  He claimed it was a cover up. Scotti also claims that he stood guard outside Cosby’s dressing room while he conducted “interviews” with young models, all supplied by an agency he had an “arrangement” with.  Although I wasn’t there, my experience is if it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck.  What’s interesting about using this scenario, ducks often look smooth on top while they are moving around like crazy underneath.  They are smooth at covering up what’s really going on.   My grandmother always said, what’s done in the dark will come to light.   

It is true that the allegations made against Mr. Cosby from the various women have reached the Statute of Limitations, however, a woman name Judy Huth, has now come forward accusing Mr. Cosby of sexual assault when she was a minor. This changes the game.  Although she can’t charge him with criminal charges, she is now suing Cosby for damages based on the “psychological damage and mental anguish” she says she received.

Unless we were in the room when all of these accusations were made, none of us were eye witnesses.   Bill Cosby’s lawyer is condemning the “media-driven feeding frenzy” and calls the latest round of allegations “utter nonsense.” Cosby also thanked Whoopi Goldberg and Jill Scott for standing by him. The question is when and how will we really get to the bottom of all this and if he is innocent, why hasn’t he spoken up for himself and why were payoffs even necessary.

 Healing Without Hate:  It’s a choice. It’s a lifestyle. Pass it on!

Visit www.WendyGladney.com and www.forgivingforliving.org.  Wendy is a coach, consultant and speaker. You may email her at [email protected] Wendy is featured on Radio Free 102.3 KJLH on Front Page with Dominique DiPrima Thursday Mornings @ 5:00am.